Saturday, 16 March 2013

RUNNING UP THE ROAD NAKED

Normally, I would say avoid anything I write on a Friday and/or Saturday evenings but, as there is no booze left in the house - tonight is safe.  A friend actually thought all my post were done while under the influence - he just hadn't realised that he is used to me being fairly restrained -ish, booze fuelled I am either laconic or infuriated and VERY rude - so I have banned myself from blogging at such times.

So, that out the way, today started well - out for a wee 10k (not in the nude, by the way) - nice - frosty, still, perfect EXCEPT it was a slippery minefield and really very funny (unlike an actual minefield obviously, so not a minefield).

First couple of Ks - dead frogs, fricking dead frogs everywhere - a wee bit too plague-y for comfort but next was sheep poop, but as I couldn't recall reference to it in Exodus, I thought these were probably not apocalyptic signs - which would have been a major bummer on a Saturday. Yep, I was just running up the old road through the Glen (ocht, you know where I mean) and it was wall to wall (no walls) squished sheep keech - squished because a vehicle had beaten me up there - some early-bird out doing their peats (again - ocht- you know what I mean) - a slippery surface in anyone's books the old sheep excrement. Finally, out onto the main road to Gress, should be no problems there....... and then I saw it..................lying there.........near the edge of the road (this is true by the way)... surely the slipperiest thing known to man..........AN ICED OVER BANANA SKIN!!! No really, I'd done dead frogs without falling over, done moist sheep poop - my final obstacle an icy banana skin. 

Well, it will surprise anyone who knows me that I didn't stand on it and fall on my arse - despite the millions of ways to avoid it - given my track record. Nope, I sailed past, and although I was tempted to give it the Vs up, I didn't - I'm not stupid - I had to come back that way. I am THE person who really did  stand on the prongs of a garden hoe and get the handle in the face - last summer in fact - had there been multiple hoes around, I dare say I'd have done the whole Side-show Bob routine.

So, that was today - apart from that I started formatting my book for kindle .........and finished.......eeeeek.......thought it would take ages. Pants! This is all getting a bit real and scary - very soon I'm going to have to put up and shut up and honestly, the idea of running up the road in the nude - whether it be obstacle strewn or no -, isn't half as scary as the idea of putting my book out there for everyone to see.

Tonight's tune is from Canadian punks Billy Talent - CD - Billy Talent III - "Saint Veronica" - for no reason except my friend Trish is coming around this evening and we both love it  (and I can't think of a song that involves slipping on frog entrails.)

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