Thursday, 21 March 2013

Today writing turned me into an Unhygenic Biscuit Murderer.

FFS!! GRRRRRR!!  That's the second time today I have departed from the real world into my head to...nope, not going to say disastrous consequences, because even for me, that would be a gross exaggeration... have departed from the real world in a manner that has inconvenienced me and possibly others.

I had the hint of a good idea for a short story last night, that was okay, this morning -IN THE SHOWER OF COURSE - (as previously mentioned one of the awkward places these things decide to manifest), it decided to come back and put some meat on its bones. Great! Yep, flipping fantastic! A couple of hours later I'm skiving about at work writing said idea down and I noticed an unpleasant aroma - someone smelt very sweaty, someone had clearly forgotten to apply deodorant, someone's ablutions had most definitely gone awry. I glanced around hoping to find a customer lurking about whom I could blame - no such luck. BUGGER.
Apart from the niff, which I smothered in many scented products, I would normally have got away with this because I tend to wear black - not today, today I had on a dark purple top, now with even darker areas in the armpit region.  Luckily, I keep a black cloak at work (as you do) and having shed my outer layer of colour, swung it around to cover up what had moments ago been having a casual day as underwear.

Dear, polite, kind colleague Joan assures me I didn't hum too badly but was very quick to remind me I was on a half day - I was pretty pleased to go, for her sake.

So, once home and all hygiene issues dealt with, I decided to be a good mother, for once, and bake stuff. With a pavlova and ice cream both made (I have a lot of eggs just now - the hens are pooping them out like fiends) I did some biscuits.  Put in the oven for ten to twelve minutes it said - so I did, then started on my story again.....

I don't think they're too bad - the biscuits - most of them survived the extra ten minutes before I noticed the smell, this time of charring biscuit rather than marinading me. 

Hopefully, that is today's olfactory assault course over, because I don't think my nasal passages can take any more stimulation.

Note to self: do as many things at once as you like, as long as one of them isn't writing.

Today's tune is from Panic!At the Disco's CD "A Fever You Can't Sweat Out" (see what I did there!) and is called "I Write Sins Not Tragedies".